Stephenie MeyerPeople who type like this:
OMG.
Mah fAvvv <3>
Jeffrey Eugenides
Girls who didn’t get enough drama when they were younger.
Lauren Weisberger
Girls who can’t read. Or think.
Jonathan Safran Foer
30somethings who were cool when they were 20something.
Ayn Rand
Workaholics seeking validation.
David Foster Wallace
Confirmed 90’s literati.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
People who can start a fire.
Charles Dickens
Ninth graders who think they’re going to be authors someday but end up in marketing.
Mark Twain
Liars.
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
People who drink scotch.
Joseph Conrad
People who drink old fashioneds.
Dominick Dunne
People who get their class from Vanity Fair.
Anne Rice
People who don’t use conditioner in their hair.
Edgar Allan Poe
Men who live in their mother’s basements. Or goth seventh graders.
Michael Crichton
Doctors who went to third-tier medical schools.
Dan Brown
People who used to get lost in supermarkets when they were kids.
Dave Eggers
Guys who are in the third coolest frat of a private college.
Emily Giffin
Women who give their boyfriend marriage ultimatums.
Anais Nin
Librarians.
William Faulkner
People who are good at crosswords.
Jackie Collins
Your drunk stepmother.
Nicholas Sparks
Women who are usually constipated.
James Patterson
Men who score a 153 on their LSAT exam.
Sylvia Plath
Girls who keep journals (too easy).
George Orwell
Conspiracy theorists (too easy).
Aldous Huxley
People who are bigger conspiracy theorists than Orwell fans.
Nick Hornby
Guys who wear skinny jeans and the girls that love them.
Hunter S Thompson
That kid in your philosophy class with the stupid tattoo.
Toni Morrison
Female high-school English professors who only have an undergraduate degree.
Thomas Pynchon
People who used to be fans of J.D. Salinger.
Elizabeth Gilbert
Women who liked the movie “Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood” but didn’t read the book.
Rebecca Wells
Women on the East coast who wish they were from the South.
Alice Sebold
People who liked Gilmore Girls – even in the first season.
Brothers Grimm
Only children with Oedipal complexes.
Nicole KraussGirls who intern at Nylon but end up moving back to the Midwest for their real job.
Virginia Woolf
Female high-school French teachers who have their master’s degree.
John IrvingPeople whose parents are divorced.
James Joyce
People who do not like John Cusack movies.
Truman CapotePeople who would never dream of owning anything that could be classified as a “
knick-knack”.
For the full list go:
here.